Driving with my newborn and husband scare

I’ve never been so happy in my life. I pray my husband and my daughter will be safe everyday and every night. My life feels like it has hope and possibilities and I have a team. I’ve never seen so much in my future and I’ve also never worried so much in my life at the same time.

Today, driving we almost got slammed from behind. We started off driving to social security to change my last name, and they apparently close at noon on Wednesdays, so that that was pointless. Then we drove to get hubby’s sunglasses that he left at the doctor’s. About an hour later we are deciding if we should go home or go get pumpkin coffee. Pumpkin coffee 🎃 won.

On the way to Dunkin the cars driving in front of us came to a pretty quick stop. Thank god I check my rear view all of the time, especially when we stop like that. The car behind me did not stop AT ALL. And was coming at us fast. I swerved over into the middle lane, and we got nipped on the passenger side.

I turned because I didn’t want to block traffic, and she followed me to the train station parking lot. She just kept saying “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry”. It was a scuff mark. Hubby and I both said “it’s ok, they can polish that out” but he did tell her we have our two month old in the back seat. We got back in our cars and I just looked at her. My cute little two month old daughter. Today was her two month birthday. She had no idea anything happened, just sitting there being cute. She could have literally been smooshed to death. What the hell! I started crying.  My husband said the other driver was in her car crying too.

I pray every night for them to be safe and for the angels to watch over them. I can’t help thinking she almost got squished. Or him too. Next time (god forbid) I should go the other side, so the person will hit my side of the car and not the side with her in it.

I worry every day. I worry my worry will make bad things happen. Matt Khan says God’s not that fickle. I hope not.

I found out that in astrology, right now is a “moon wobble”, which is like an eclipse but because the earth wobbles an eclipse doesn’t happen, but still, bad things can happen, and catastrophic events tend to happen during these, every 86.5 days or so, and it lasts for another few weeks. I wish I didn’t know that. I mean by those standards what are we in a moon wobble constantly?!

I just want my husband and my baby to be here with me forever. I’ve never been so happy and it’s so scary that it could all be gone so easily. He is so handsome and loving and she is so beautiful and perfect. I’ve never been loved like this EVER. I want us to be a normal old couple, old and together forever and can watch our kids grow. Does everyone worry this much? I’ve had some loss in my life, like most people have. I never thought I would be married, to such an amazing man and I thought I’d never have kids, even though I wanted both so much. Now I have them, and I am literally so frieken grateful. Please god let me keep them. I deserve to be happy.

I just put her down for bed and thanked god and the angels. That’s all I can do. I’m also glad I’m a good driver.

What’s your birth story?

As a pretty crunchy mom I was so nervous about giving birth in a hospital. I thought they were going to force all of these vaccines one me and just pressure me into things I didn’t want. I wanted to go natural and skip the baby vaccines because I personally don’t think a brand new baby needs hep b vaccine or antibiotics in her eyes or vitamin k. I did give her vitamin k because it made me so nervous to think about her bleeding out but the next baby I think I will stick with giving her oral vitamin k. I’ll explain why I caved and gave her vitamin k later.

I actually printed out a pretty severe birth plan, edited and gave it to my doctors, including the baby not leaving the room and I prepped my mom and husband to be my backups. As time passed in the hospital I realized these nurses were amazing and were on my side and one even said to my husband “I don’t blame you” to not agreeing to vaccines. The physicians were the ones who tried to push them the most. And not my main doctor. He did not give his daughter all of the vaccines, “only the ones that would save her life” in his words.

I am glad I did so much research and I can share my birthplan with anyone who would like it.

The actual birth of my babygirl was very easy. The giving of birth isn’t what hurts the most (as far as I can remember), they do say a chemical gets released that makes you forget how bad the pain is. Honestly for me it was the contractions which were in my lower back that hurt the most, and were 30 seconds apart by then. You can see my previous post for what led up to the birth. My labor began as feeling like I had to poo, and within 2 hours my contractions were about an hour a part, by the time I got to the hospital they were 30 seconds a part. Everything was very quick.

I immediately wanted to push but they told me not to as they had to wait for the doctor on call to get to my room and get prepped, which she did quickly. Thank god. The doctor I had was not even in the practice I went to, which was annoying to me because as most obgyns do, they make you see all the doctors in the practice, 32-40 weeks, when you start going to the doctors every other week and then every week.

That was so annoying to me because my doctor’s office in an hour away, and being pregnant, in traffic, having to pee, getting done work early, to see a doctor who hardly touched me for the first few appointments was A LOT. Which was actually better then the internals later, but still very inconvenient. Next time I am going to tell my doctor I just want to see him instead of doing the tour because I didn’t even have any of them in the hospital anyway. And I would have been much more comfortable with my main gyno and not being asked the same questions about vaccines every week.

During those last chunk of appointments they just check your blood pressure and listen to the babies heart beat, if your not high risk. I didn’t have an ultrasound since 20 weeks. I saw one Doctor out of the practice who I hated, and was the only one I absolutely did not want. I cried in my car after my appointment with her, as she tried to fear monger me into getting vaccinated while pregnant. (None of the vaccines are tested on pregnant women or babies under 2). All of the other doctors were surprisingly understanding, as were the nurses in the hospital.

It’s not until the last few weeks that you start getting internals again, when they start telling you if you are effaced or dilated.

My first internal I think was at 35 weeks, which I was not ready for and it made me want to cry, I was already 2cm dialated. Which only made me cry more because I asked the doctor what that means and he gave me an estimate of like 2 weeks for the baby to come. I realized it was happening soon and started to bawl. apparently everything makes you cry when you’re in your third trimester. Or when you’re a water sign. The doctor literally walked out of the room while I was crying, and never told me how effaced I was. I made DH (dear husband) come to the next few appointments with me, which was interesting. Him seeing me get internal exams.

The next 2 appointments I was 3cm and 90% effaced. I started prepping my boss that I might go out early. My one friend said “well, at least your body can do it by itself.”

My main doctor later told me, it doesn’t matter which you are, effaced or dilated, or how much, your not in labor until the contractions start. Effaced is how thin your uterine walls are, and dilated is how open your cervix is. My and DH stopped having sex around that time.

My last appointment, my only internal with a woman, who surprisingly was so much rougher and made me bleed a lot. I think she was the reason I went into labor early. Oh and also because I drank red raspberry leaf tea, which is good for your uterus to drink during pregnancy, and after, and good for your milk supply, but can also make you go into labor I guess! She actually guessed 8.5 lbs and she was right.

Back to the actual labor. I am on the table, waiting to be told when I can push. Husband is holding my left shoulder and hand and my mom is next to him. The doctor is at the end of the bed, and next to her are the two nurses.

Something I didn’t know was you only push when you are having contractions, which was easy for me since they were every 30 seconds. My water never broke so I was asking if I can push because I could feel something coming out. My water sack was coming out of me. Which is basically why I didn’t give birth in the car. They also make you push three times for every contraction for 10 seconds each. As I mentioned in my previous post I am a kegel goddess and could have went much longer. Laughing.

My husband is a personal trainer so he loved helping me count 10 seconds and tell me “go to go!” “You can do it!”. He likes to tell people how magical it was to see my vagina open like a flower and the water sack come out. Gross. Laughing again.

The 6th contraction I felt the baby and I knew someone saw her head. The doctor was trying to stretch me out.

The 7th contraction, she gave me an episiotomy,  I’ll get into that later. I felt the baby,  I knew she was ready and I was scared to leave her in the birth canal just sitting there. It was like in the movies when you see from the person in the beds point of view looking up at everyone surround the bed, and everyone cheering me on. So I just pushed my hardest and let out a scream. And I felt her shoulders and then the rest of her bloody slide and wiggle out.



How long was your labor?

“How long was your labor?”

Something everyone asks new moms. You hear stories like…

“Oh my god! Mine was 40 hours long! I had to have my mom hold one leg, my best friend hold my other and my boyfriend dump water on my head!”

Or “you don’t want to hear about my labor”… 27 hours, c-section after laboring for 2 days etc. Well let me tell you mine was the complete opposite. Not every labor is super hard. But a super quick one can have its own set of circumstances to watch out for.

Now, I did use certified crystal yoni eggs which are basically like weights for making kegels more effective, and have healing properties as well. I use Grace Diaz on Etsy, she has her’s certified to make sure there are no chemicals, and that they are the crystals they are meant to be. I can get more into this topic another time if warranted, but most people begin with jade, mediums, or black obsidian to suck out the bad energy, or clear quartz which can be programmed for anything, or rose quartz to show their pussy love.

I also consider myself relatively naturally athletic. But I don’t think that was the only reason my labor was only around 4.5 hours long. My mom also had a really quick labor, at 16, and apparently my Nan had at least one that was like mine where she wasn’t even sure she was in labor until it was too late.

I went into it knowing I was strong and my body would not fail me. Which I think it an important mindset a woman needs to have. Of course I was nervous as most moms are the whole pregnancy that something could go arise, but hopeful all would go well, and it did. I do believe it is important to believe in your body. Women have been pushing 8.5 lb babies out since women were invented by God.

Anyway, my story is this;

My husband got home from work at 9:30ish. My grandmom came over during my lunch break earlier in the day (I work from home) to drop off food and she swore I was going into labor that night. My mom’s husband also bet I was giving birth that Friday (the next day). They were both right. So I put the food in the oven, and waited for DH (dear husband). DH gets home, and I tell him my stomach hurts and I need to go poo. So I go upstairs while he eats, TMI, and I sit on the toilet texting my other pregnant friends, because everyone I know is literally pregnant or was this year. I had two best friends about a week more pregnant than me and one a few days less pregnant than me. So I’m texting them that I’m not sure if I have to poop or if it’s labor. They both tell me that happened to them last week, and they pooped and it was fine. So I keep getting up and sitting back down, nothings happening except I am in pain and feel like I gotta poo. I wish I knew this was a sign of labor.

Earlier that day I found the webmd pregnancy app that has a contraction tool so you can track your contractions. I start tracking. Now it becomes clear that these are real, as the pain started radiating from my lower back to my uterus and then down my thighs. I start telling DH we might need to go to the hospital. I havent mentioned yet that my hospital is an hour away. So I start tracking and they are about a minute and a half apart.

My contractions started at 1.5 mins apart and quickly went to 1 minute.

In the meantime I’m telling DH to do some laundry in case it goes until tomorrow, I’m not thinking clearly. My cat is looking at me like he’s so scared, curled in a ball next to the dog on the bed, while I’m hunched over the side repacking my hospital bag. DH keeps waiting for me to tell him what to do. So now we are about 2 and a half hours after I went to the bathroom earlier, and I tell him ok we need to go, NOW! Throwing clothes in the car, the carseat, and ourselves, we leave. It’s 12:35am. I know because I text my mom we were leaving. I grab a towel literally in case I give birth on the way in the car. I call the Doctor’s office and talk to the emergency line who pages the dr on call and she calls me back. I ask her if I’ll make it to the hospital. She says she has no way to tell me that. We decide to try to make it to the hospital.

I am still tracking the contractions on the webmd pregnancy app and DH is looking at it go down to 30 seconds apart. People in movies are always screaming. I apparently am a quiet person in pain. He was asking if I was ok and all I could do was breath and hold the “oh-shit” handle as he drove 100 miles an hour down 76 with his blinkers on.

We arrive. An hour drive took us 40 minutes because thank god it was midnight on a Thursday, and no one was on the road.

My mom was in the emergency room parking lot waving us down already, and I wobble slowly out of the car, telling her they are 30 seconds a part and we need to hurry. She’s a nurse, so she runs in and grabs a wheel chair. From here on out the receptionist and everyone else are hurrying me through the different stages of registering.

They literally ask you to sign paperwork and give them your identification and make a will, and ask you 100 questions, while you’re having contractions, it’s kind of ridiculous. Luckily everyone realized this was happening quick and to hurry the f up. Honestly they were the best nurses I ever had.

So I go from the initial room where they make sure your having contractions and ask you questions, to the delivery room in about an hour. DH took a picture of me rolling down the hallway at 1:59am holding my paperwork, and an hour later the baby was born.

Everyone congratulated me for the next two days including the hospital staff and laughed about how crazy the whole thing was, and how awesome I did and DH was literally so proud. The labor itself was about 7 contractions worth of pushing and my little one was out. 8 lbs 5.6 ounces, at 38 weeks. Apparently that’s a big baby. Well if I can do it you can too. No sweat 😅. Kidding.

If you are interested and want to read more of my stories or find out about all of the different products and things I’ve tried so far for the baby, please follow me and see my next posts. ❤️